FOLLOW THE LEADER! LEADERSHIP ~ Nothing in Life Is Free All dogs, whether timid or assertive, need a leader they can count on and respect. It is essential that your dog look to you for leadership. All dogs need a leader! Dogs who are shy in public or with strange people or animals aren't always submissive in all aspects of their lives. They may even be pushy and disrespectful with their own pack members. Your dog must look to you for direction and allow you to make decisions where his fear or bossiness may tell him to act otherwise, and most of all he must TRUST you to keep him safe.

So, how do we establish ourselves as leader?
Your dog must look to you as the sole source for comfort, food, attention and play. He must look to you as provider and protector. You cannot force him to respect you, you must earn his respect. He must learn to follow your lead.

"He must elect you as leader of his own free will." - Jan Fennell

 

If you are to be the leader you must control assets: * Control all food - Establish specific feeding schedules. No begging/no sharing. * Control all sleeping areas - leaders get the best resting areas (no dogs hogging the bed or couch!) * Control all games and toys - you say when, with what, for how long - you make the rules! * Control all access to areas (doorways, hallways, etc.) - leaders go first! Control all ATTENTION!

Food.
Before you put the bowl down, have your dog follow a few simple obedience commands. If your dog tries to dive on the bowl before you give him permission to eat, pick up the bowl and start over. When your dog stops eating and walks away from the bowl, pick up any remaining food and dispose of it. You decide when dinner time is, where he eats and how much he gets. No sharing from your own plate. Begging can be a form of intimidation for the bossy dog. Your dog must learn to earn. Dogs who never have to work to earn their living (their food) may see no reason to obey their owner at any time because they can get what they want without any conditions at all. If your dog refuses to sit before you put his dinner down or walks away without eating, quietly put his food away until the next regularly scheduled meal. It's completely up to him whether he eats or not--don't try to convince him. Let him discover where his own best interests lie!

Sleeping arrangements. Leaders don't let subordinates push them out of bed and hog the pillow. Leaders don't move over to give subordinates the better spot on the couch. Part of shyness can also be co-dependency: the dog who can't cope when left alone. Sleeping plastered against you all night feeds into that pattern. Sleeping on its own bed away from you or in a crate spells it out for the dog that it is you, the leader, who gets the best resting place and also helps him learn to cope on his own. Many non-bossy dogs share furniture with no problems and there's no reason to kick them off the bed if they are polite about sharing. If your dog does share the bed or couch, he should wait patiently for your invitation and lie down where you direct him and get off without complaint.

Games & Toys.
The games you play can instill control, build confidence and establish leadership, or un-do ALL the hard work you've done in training and establishing yourself as leader. Dogs who push toys at you, demanding that you play NOW have been given the impression that they get to make the rules. Leaders say when, with what, for how long and leaders end up with the trophy! Put favorite toys away and bring them out when YOU want to play.

Rights of access. Leaders decide who comes and goes, who's accepted and who isn't. You will establish yourself as leader by insisting your dog sit and wait for permission to go in or out of the house or car. Your dog must Yield the Right of Way when in your path, rather than you skirting around "his highness." Put the leash on and instruct him to sit and stay as guests enter or leave. Show him you are in charge and in control of the situation. Temper tantrums over "not getting to go with you" are also not allowed! Respecting your space. You are not a jungle gym. Dogs who leap willy-nilly uninvited, up, over and on top of you are being rude and disrespectful as are dogs who ram into you in doorways or stairways. Do not allow it. Hanging around begging for food and swiping stuff off counters right under your nose are also signs that your dog does not respect your space or your leadership. Ration Attention. It may sound counter-intuitive to pay LESS attention when you want your dog to appreciate your attention more. Leadership is more about rationing and controlling resources than physical displays, in fact in the dog world, the one who does all the posturing is usually the wannabe! Ration EVERYthing your dog loves in life and make you how he gets them (toys, games, all food (hand feed) and especially attention. Sometimes the aloof independent types get gushed over for daining to bother to ask for a pat - so they control all interactions, they ask, they get fussed over and then THEY dismiss the peon human when they are done. The human ends up on the "oh goodie his highness noticed me" end of the lower pack member scale. If he asks for an ear scratch, ignore him- turn away: "not now." When he wanders off, call him back and gush, but dismiss HIM before he is has had enough. Leave him wanting more. Make him follow you all over the house working for his meals. Pet him before each handful. If he wanders off, put the food away and he gets no more til you call and he comes running to do your bidding. The goal is to have the bossy dog hope YOUR highness will notice him! Be consistent. The whole family must agree and enforce all rules. Don't make exceptions to your rules; your dog needs a clear message, 24 hours a day.

See also:
How to Play With Your Dog and Good Games, Bad Games
You and Your Teenage Dog and Time Out!
and From the Dog's Point of View
Mounting Behavior

great articles:

Nothing in Life is Free - Denver DFL
Nothing in Life is Free - Deb McKean
Reconsidering the Dominance Model in Dog Training
When Good Walruses Go Bad - Kathy Sdao
Leading the Dance
Alpha Roll
Dog Psychology - the Dog Whisperer Controversy - by Lisa Mullinax, CPDT

This handout may be reprinted in its entirety for distribution free of charge and with full credit given:
© CAROL A. BYRNES "DIAMONDS IN THE RUFF" Training for Dogs & Their People -
ditr_training @ hotmail.com - http://www.diamondsintheruff.com